Showing posts with label Bananas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bananas. Show all posts

Monday, June 3, 2013

OH MAH GOD! I Fucking LOVE Major Lazer!!!

If you haven't heard this song and seen this video then you must have been living under a rock for the past 3 hours. This shit is fucking BANANAS! It's Pon De Floor version 3.0. It's like Cirque du Soleil meets DOA: Dead or Alive plus Attack of the 50 ft. Woman. 

Fair Warning that the following might, can, probably will, or already is happening right now:

1) I will be quoting the white chicks at the beginning for at least the next 3 months. "This beat is fucking dope... Hold still bitch.. Look like a slut." 

2) I am making this my new default cellphone ringtone. Sorry Bauer but the Harlem Shake is soooo 5 months ago. 

3) I am getting those white and green boxing Nikes the one chick is wearing because they are super cute.

4) Don't be surprised if I bust my ass out somewhere doing that super crucial semi-split 3 point stand and end up in the emergency room of a hospital stuck in that position. If you can't and don't see that coming then clearly you don't know me very well and you haven't been paying one damn bit of attention.

Major Lazer ft. 2 Chainz, Bruno Mars, Tyga & Mystic - Bubble Butt

Friday, April 26, 2013

Super Slik Strawberry Banana Smoothie Recipe

Soooo... I'm all about health and fitness and lowering my blood pressure because it's been getting craaaaazzzzyyyy high now that I'm getting older. Lately I have gotten into making smoothies and they seem to be helping. Friends and dudes I date have been saying stuff like "OH! I've been wanting to get into smoothies. I hear they're really good for you. What do you put in yours?" Well here is my secret. I've been using a variety of different fruits so here is the recipe for today's smoothie...

Super Slik Strawberry Banana Smoothie

  • 1 Banana sliced (full of potassium=good for the heart)
  • 1/2 Cup Frozen or Fresh Strawberries sliced (really I just grab a fistful out of the bag.. also medium potassium and full of Vitamin C)
  • 1/3 Cup Fat Free Vanilla Greek Yogurt - Dannon Oikos is the best tasting (it is soooo much better than regular yogurt and is higher in protein just in case you didn't know)
  • 1 Tbsp Raw Honey (local if you can find it because it helps with allergies and it is now Allergy Season-little tip for all nerds like me)
  • 1/2 Cup of Ice Cubes (like 5-6, you're not making a daiquiri.. just getting it to be nice and cold)
  • 1/2 Cup Orange Juice (because I currently have bronchitis and it has Vitamin C and also lots of potassium)

***The amounts of each ingredient can really be adjusted to whatever you want depending on your own tastes. You can also substitute whatever fruit and juice you want too.

Throw it all in a blender as you go and blend it until all the stuff is blended. Personally, I prefer my Magic Bullet I got for Christmas a few years ago because it makes individual servings in these lovely plastic mugs. If you do use a Magic Bullet cup though just keep schmoooshing it down as you go so you can fit it all in (that's what she said). Stir it to make sure it's smooth. Then go in.

Now here comes the good part...

Nutrition Info
Total Calories: 299 (you'd think it would be less because it's mostly fruit)
Carbs: 72.33g (but they are good carbs and you need them so don't believe all that low/no carb hype BS)
Protein: 8.21g (yeah, you need that for your muscles)
Fat: 0.5g (that's the best part... it's sweet but it won't make your booty look like a waffle)

These are great for starting your morning off, as a pre-workout carb load snack, or just to have as a treat for dessert in the evenings.. You could maybe even throw some vodka or rum in it if you're feeling kinda froggy on a Friday night. I hope you like it cause it's freakin YUMMY!!!




Damn right I put that mofo next to some flowers! Flowers make everything look prettier... especially since I didn't think to save some fruit to garnish it with. Who do you think I am? Martha Stewart?