Happy Throwdowns and Throwbacks Thoroughly Twerked Out Thursday Theme Songs!

Happy Friday Eve everybody! We've almost survived the week so YAY for us! Today is one gigantic installment of Twerkathon OH-13 because that's what I'm feeling. So I've thoroughly twerked this MoFo out with tons of new and old jams I dug up just for you. So, let's make like this is a bubble and get it poppin...

First up, you know it.. The 2 CHAINZ Song of the Day! I'm still waiting for more leaks from the new album. But in the meantime, here is Trampoline by Tinie Tempah featuring 2 CHAINZ! 

Now before we go any further, I have to tell you that today's theme songs were inspired by my bestie Jeannie and our Tuesday Night Twerkfest in her kitchen. The following videos are courtesy of her... All I have to say is your shopping excursions at Walmart will NEVER be the same...

Part One:

Wait! It gets better! Part 2:

If you follow me on My Twitter or you've "Liked" the Miss Slik's Guide Facebook Page then that should explain the posts from the other night. (Click those links if you don't FYI BTW because you should be following and "liking".)

Also, thanks to all the twerking videos we watched I found a couple more songs I'm diggin that are a little slower and great for practicing in front of that mirror gurrrrrlllll!!!

And also...

Now, Jeannie and I tore through Diplo's Sound Cloud Profile the other night because I was hellbent on finding the 2 tracks of his I liked that were playing in the background of the Instagram video submissions he posted. I did not find them. Somebody please let that man know he should post the names of the songs in the captions to make it easier because that should not be quite this difficult.

Also, while you're at it, tell him he needs to lay off the Perculator bubble pops because they are in a giant rack of his tracks... You just can't beat the original.

However, I did find the 2 CHAINZ Song of the Day and also these 2 songs I like...

The DMV's own Wale featuring Travis Porter - One Eyed Kitten

And also Travis Porter - Wobble

Just in case you haven't noticed yet, I have a minor obsession with Travis Porter. He doesn't know. If he did then the restraining order would be pending (just kidding).

Now, I would like to share something personal with y'all... My own story of how I became acquainted with booty bouncing...

For those who don't know, I'm originally from Tampa, Florida and lived there until I was almost 13. Down there they start school the 3rd week of August so they had a rule that you have to turn 5 by the end of August to start Kindergarten. Well, my birthday is September 5th so I missed that cut-off and my parents had to put me in a montessori school to get around it.

The student age range was Kindergarten up to like middle or high school and I always wanted to hang out with all the older kids. Every day they'd have the boom box blaring and they'd dance. I love to dance. So I tried to go dance with them and they told me I couldn't because I sucked. Well, never one to accept defeat, I went home and I practiced like it was my job. I even enlisted the help of the teenage girls who babysat me at the time. One day I came back and busted out my best Paula Abdul body roll and they were like "OH! Look at Niki!"

Hold up.. Gotta take it there...

I became their little mascot after that and I had never been so proud. That's the moment when you look over at the kids your own age who made fun of you for wearing hi-tops with twirly skirts and told you that you had to be Irma every time they played Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles just because you didn't have red hair and stick out your tongue and be all like "Suck it babies! Turtle Power THAT bitches!"

A few years later, I had to switch to public school because my parents couldn't afford to keep me in montessori school any longer. That's when I became a latchkey kid and I watched MTV like it was my job thanks to my babysitters getting me hooked on it. My parents never really censored me that much anyway so I pretty much watched whatever I wanted. One of my favorite shows was a dance show called The Grind. The Spring Break editions were how I got introduced to songs like this one...

 

One day I came home from school and turned on the TV. I must have ended up on The Box (cyber high five if you know about that). This video came on and shocked me...

Some of those chicks were wearing thongs and stuff and dancing in ways that they just did not show on the muh-F-ing Grind. It was over after that. I may have gotten in trouble for calling into The Box to request that song a few times.

Like I said I grew up in Florida so come Summertime all your old jeans become cut-off shorts. Mine became Daisy Dukes...

Also, of course I learned the Tootsee Roll...

And that's about when I got introduced to a man named Sir Mix-A-Lot and this song became my theme song. Bear in mind, while most girls were getting boobs, I was busy growing a booty... No lie... Here..

 I've had this mofo since I was 10 years old. Just took me some years to make the connection from the rap songs to real life and figure out why all the boys kept staring at it. True story.

And of course that is around the time I discovered my love of Uncle Luke. Last one is for Jeannie...

Don't stop get it get it... BOOM!

Happy Monday Theme Songs: Super Fresh 2 CHAINZ, Twerkathon OH-13 - Twerking Trainwreck, and Wiz Khalifa!

Happy Monday My People! Good Lord! We have A LOT to get into so in the words of Kendrick Lamar, let's make like this is a swimming pool full of liquor and dive in...

First up is, as per the new usual, the 2 CHAINZ Song of the Day... I <3 me some super fresh 2 CHAINZ like no other and it really doesn't get any fresher than this song that was just released this morning. It's called Netflix featuring Fergie and it's crazy hot.

Next up is Twerkathon OH-13 and all I have to say is HOLY FREAKING GOD DID YOU SEE MILEY CYRUS ON THE MTV VMA's LAST NIGHT?!?!?! It was baaaaaaaadddddddd... not baaaaaadddd meaning good but like baaaaaddddd meaning a horrible hot mess trainwreck that will haunt my nightmares for months. 

Just in case you missed it.. Hold up! Wait a minute! I got you! (WARNING: It's so disturbing that even the Smith family couldn't hide the looks of horror on their faces. Someone should've jumped on stage and been like "Stop it Miley! Can't you see you're scaring the children?!")



usmagazine.com

Here is the video on YouTube:

But the best place to go is directly to MTV's website and watch it there:

We Can't Stop/Blurred Lines/Give It 2 U Medley - MTV VMA's Performance

While she was grinding on Robin Thicke I seriously threw up in my mouth a little. I also don't understand what was up with her hair or those giant plush mouse bear things strapped to her fly girls. For real, the only good thing about that entire performance was when 2 CHAINZ and Kendrick Lamar came out. Thank God for them. I'm just not sure how they could keep straight faces while Miley was over in the cut humping that foam finger.

For real, somebody needs to let that chick know she's about as ratchet as a doily at a D.A.R. tea party and that one stripper booty wiggle move of hers does not count as "twerking". You need to bend yo knees bitch! Bend yo knees and pop yo booty! What's even more disturbing is the number of youngin white girls out there right now emulating her as we speak. Girls, please I beg of you, don't go out like that. It's not a good look and NOBODY will think you're hot or sexy except for drunk frat boys who will try to date rape you. 

Let's draw a quick white girl comparison shall we?

Fergie - Fergalicious

• Knows how to pop her booty properly.
• She looks hot riding a stationary bike in leggings.
• This video is how I learned to do a 3-point stand.  

Miley Cyrus - We Can't Stop

• Does NOT know how to shake her booty properly.
• Does NOT look hot riding a stationary bike in leggings (Fergie biter!)
• Should NOT be teaching young girls how to do any sort of stands period nor doing them herself because it just doesn't look right. 

The reality is that even though Miley "can't stop" she should really try HARD to stop for the sake of all of us. This is an example of when keeping it real goes way wrong. Even Twerkaholics Anonymous couldn't help poor Miley. I believe she needs an exorcist... and also needs to go back home and practice in front of that mirror gurrrrlll! Practice until the ghost of Ludacris pops out of that mirror...

Now for those of you who are not as severely twerk-challenged as poor Miley, here are your songs to practice in front of your own mirrors at home. Let that girl be your measuring stick of how far you've probably come in the past week from a hot mess toward actually being able to drop it like its hot thanks to all these instructional videos and continued practice.

Anyway, songs...

Read a great article today by a guy named David Turner called How Twerking On Vine Sent Years-Old Rap Songs Up the iTunes Charts. I'm diggin a couple videos he linked in it.

Sage the Gemini feat. IamSu - Gas Pedal

Now he posted the original of Finatticz - Don't Drop That Thun Thun Thun which is good... But I found the remix with Tyga that is better.

And now for the more serious stuff... A mini-tribute to Wiz Khalifa. My boy Quincy whom you might know as Uncle Jesse got me to get back on Twitter the other day. I started following Wiz Khalifa and I like his vibe. He seems humble and I like that he's about his fans. Look...

This is my boy E-Dub's fave because he's a Steelers fan...

This one featuring The Weekend is my personal fave...

This song is my mantra...

I stumbled across this one today featuring Smoke DZA. My favorite line is "Put that iPhone down fool. Don't try to Instagram me. That's ho shit."

And finally, this song featuring Bow Wow and RoZe called Run (Tell 'Em Dat) is like the new theme song for my life. The hook goes:

"Looking in the mirror talking to myself.

You have control over you and not nobody else.

Look I got plenty haters. They talk behind my back.

But I just do this shit. Y'all run and tell em that."

Basically...

 

BOOM!

Happy Tuesday Theme Songs From A$ap Rocky...

Happy Tuesday People! Keep repeating this mantra to yourself "I will survive this week. I have got to survive this week." Today's theme songs are all from a particular artist who I am seriously feeling in the most major of ways to end all major ways... A$ap Rocky.

For those of you who don't know about A$ap Rocky, he is a 24 year old rapper out of Harlem whose real name is Rakim Mayers (he was named after legendary hip hop artist Rakim). A$ap has been homeless, sold drugs, his brother died, etc. He has lived the life.

He's released 2 albums thus far. The first was a mixtape called Live. Love. A$ap back in 2011. It's awesome and you should listen to the whole thing. The second was his first mainstream album called Long. Live. A$ap released in January 2013. It's also awesome and you should listen to the whole thing.

You ever hear a song that is SOOOOOOO FREAKING AMAZINGLY GOOD it makes you want to like pull your hair and mush your face and go "OH. MY. GOD. This song is SICK!"? That is how pretty much everything this dude has put out makes me feel. But this song in particular is disgustingly sick. It's called Bass and it is #3 off the mixtape Live. Love. A$ap...

This one is also good. It's #2 off the mixtape...

Another good one.. #10 off the mixtape...

Now let's get into some new stuff off Long. Live. A$ap...

Of course you know this song with Skrillex. If you don't see Happy Monday! Theme Songs to Kick Off Yet Another Week...

Then of course there is this one with 2 CHAINZ, Drake, and Kendrick Lamar (who is also crazy awesome)...

But I'm sure you haven't heard this one yet... It's so dark and weird and obscure that I just don't know if people are quite ready. This is the title track off the album..

Also this one is crucial...

This last one is not on the mixtape or the album but I'm feelin it.. It's called Shabba and it's by another member of the A$ap Mob crew, A$ap Ferg. It features A$ap Rocky and the video has a special cameo made in it by none other than the legendary dancehall artist Shabba Ranks. There is an article on MTV's website that talks about just how rare this is called A$AP Ferg Explains 'Very Rare' Shabba Ranks Cameo, Frame By Frame...

There are loads more songs by A$ap Rocky that I encourage you to check out so go get your YouTube on like now!