Happy Monday Theme Songs: Super Fresh 2 CHAINZ, Twerkathon OH-13 - Twerking Trainwreck, and Wiz Khalifa!

Happy Monday My People! Good Lord! We have A LOT to get into so in the words of Kendrick Lamar, let's make like this is a swimming pool full of liquor and dive in...

First up is, as per the new usual, the 2 CHAINZ Song of the Day... I <3 me some super fresh 2 CHAINZ like no other and it really doesn't get any fresher than this song that was just released this morning. It's called Netflix featuring Fergie and it's crazy hot.

Next up is Twerkathon OH-13 and all I have to say is HOLY FREAKING GOD DID YOU SEE MILEY CYRUS ON THE MTV VMA's LAST NIGHT?!?!?! It was baaaaaaaadddddddd... not baaaaaadddd meaning good but like baaaaaddddd meaning a horrible hot mess trainwreck that will haunt my nightmares for months. 

Just in case you missed it.. Hold up! Wait a minute! I got you! (WARNING: It's so disturbing that even the Smith family couldn't hide the looks of horror on their faces. Someone should've jumped on stage and been like "Stop it Miley! Can't you see you're scaring the children?!")



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Here is the video on YouTube:

But the best place to go is directly to MTV's website and watch it there:

We Can't Stop/Blurred Lines/Give It 2 U Medley - MTV VMA's Performance

While she was grinding on Robin Thicke I seriously threw up in my mouth a little. I also don't understand what was up with her hair or those giant plush mouse bear things strapped to her fly girls. For real, the only good thing about that entire performance was when 2 CHAINZ and Kendrick Lamar came out. Thank God for them. I'm just not sure how they could keep straight faces while Miley was over in the cut humping that foam finger.

For real, somebody needs to let that chick know she's about as ratchet as a doily at a D.A.R. tea party and that one stripper booty wiggle move of hers does not count as "twerking". You need to bend yo knees bitch! Bend yo knees and pop yo booty! What's even more disturbing is the number of youngin white girls out there right now emulating her as we speak. Girls, please I beg of you, don't go out like that. It's not a good look and NOBODY will think you're hot or sexy except for drunk frat boys who will try to date rape you. 

Let's draw a quick white girl comparison shall we?

Fergie - Fergalicious

• Knows how to pop her booty properly.
• She looks hot riding a stationary bike in leggings.
• This video is how I learned to do a 3-point stand.  

Miley Cyrus - We Can't Stop

• Does NOT know how to shake her booty properly.
• Does NOT look hot riding a stationary bike in leggings (Fergie biter!)
• Should NOT be teaching young girls how to do any sort of stands period nor doing them herself because it just doesn't look right. 

The reality is that even though Miley "can't stop" she should really try HARD to stop for the sake of all of us. This is an example of when keeping it real goes way wrong. Even Twerkaholics Anonymous couldn't help poor Miley. I believe she needs an exorcist... and also needs to go back home and practice in front of that mirror gurrrrlll! Practice until the ghost of Ludacris pops out of that mirror...

Now for those of you who are not as severely twerk-challenged as poor Miley, here are your songs to practice in front of your own mirrors at home. Let that girl be your measuring stick of how far you've probably come in the past week from a hot mess toward actually being able to drop it like its hot thanks to all these instructional videos and continued practice.

Anyway, songs...

Read a great article today by a guy named David Turner called How Twerking On Vine Sent Years-Old Rap Songs Up the iTunes Charts. I'm diggin a couple videos he linked in it.

Sage the Gemini feat. IamSu - Gas Pedal

Now he posted the original of Finatticz - Don't Drop That Thun Thun Thun which is good... But I found the remix with Tyga that is better.

And now for the more serious stuff... A mini-tribute to Wiz Khalifa. My boy Quincy whom you might know as Uncle Jesse got me to get back on Twitter the other day. I started following Wiz Khalifa and I like his vibe. He seems humble and I like that he's about his fans. Look...

This is my boy E-Dub's fave because he's a Steelers fan...

This one featuring The Weekend is my personal fave...

This song is my mantra...

I stumbled across this one today featuring Smoke DZA. My favorite line is "Put that iPhone down fool. Don't try to Instagram me. That's ho shit."

And finally, this song featuring Bow Wow and RoZe called Run (Tell 'Em Dat) is like the new theme song for my life. The hook goes:

"Looking in the mirror talking to myself.

You have control over you and not nobody else.

Look I got plenty haters. They talk behind my back.

But I just do this shit. Y'all run and tell em that."

Basically...

 

BOOM!

Happy Monday Theme Songs For Your House Party Hangover!

Happy Monday My People! This is for everyone who went hard in the muthafuckin p-p-p-paint over the weekend that is now like "OH. MAH. GOD Whahappin? Why the F am I not in my bed right now?"

First off, we need to get in the 2 CHAINZ song of the day... This morning I was watching the Today Show while I was getting ready for work and they had a segment on how to make a good first impression. One of the people they were interviewing said something about how you should try to be like other people and mimic their behavior because people get very bristley when you're different.

Soooooo basically, in order to be accepted by people you don't know you should pretend to be someone your not and become a sheepish little lemming. 2 words: 1) Fuck and 2) That.. FUCK THAT! Folks, don't ever dim your shine for anyone. If they don't like the outgoing, dynamic, unique individual you are then you don't need them in your life. I'm dealing with a similar situation at the moment with the Karaoke Drama Crew. God forbid you ever rock a title belt or a crown on your head and rep what you do around this group of people. They will not see it as a positive thing and you will be called conceited. Well, I think they can sit on it and rotate because like 2 CHAINZ said "I'm different!"

Next, people keep asking what I think of Kendrick Lamar because he's all up in the mix with 2 CHAINZ and A$ap Rocky but I don't really post much about him. I had a very interesting discussion with my boy Rob One last week and he asked what I thought about Kendrick calling himself the King of New York while Rakim, KRS One, and other Hip Hop legends were still alive and performing.

My response was this, Kendrick Lamar is relevant to everybody right now especially the kids. Rakim, KRS One, De La Soul and the rest of the old school heads are only relevant to people like us older folks and serious hip hop fans. So sure, I'll agree. He is the King of New York.. for now. He's a solid MC with mad skills. I personally just don't care for all the sound clips that make his songs like 20 minutes long when the music part is only like 3 minutes long.

There are a couple interesting articles I found though. One was written last week called Best/worst of 2013, so far: Kendrick Lamar puts the rap game (and N.Y.) on notice that goes into the situation about Kendrick calling himself the King of NY and how he outrapped Big Sean on his own song. The second one is from today called Nas Comments on Kendrick Lamar's "King of New York" Declaration and Nas says he has nothing but love for Kendrick and isn't really disputing it. So there you go.

Here is the song he went buck on...

and here is the song I'm loving at the moment by Kendrick Lamar because I secretly hope my proverbial dick gets big as the Eiffel Tower so I could fuck the world for 72 hours... Where are my dominos?!?!

OK, so over the weekend I went to a house partay for my friend Max's birthday. The next few songs are dedicated to him and the party. It was pretty off the chain and we had an installment of Twerkathon OH-13 out on his patio for most of the night. We should keep Twerkathon going in a big way for the rest of the year. So to kick it off on the internet, here is a theme song from the Kings of Twerk, the Ying Yang Twins...

Next, I now have some bruises and scratches thanks to this song and a dude from the other night who was a little too drunk for the Twerkathon. I was perhaps a little too drunk for it at that point too but it's all good. Anyway, what would it be without Travis Porter?

And finally, because I like to throw a little something in here for everybody, this song is one that I'm seriously all about because I woke up to it Saturday morning. It was a ringtone I downloaded for my alarms and it is probably the best song ever to wake up to...

BOOM!

Happy Tuesday Theme Songs From A$ap Rocky...

Happy Tuesday People! Keep repeating this mantra to yourself "I will survive this week. I have got to survive this week." Today's theme songs are all from a particular artist who I am seriously feeling in the most major of ways to end all major ways... A$ap Rocky.

For those of you who don't know about A$ap Rocky, he is a 24 year old rapper out of Harlem whose real name is Rakim Mayers (he was named after legendary hip hop artist Rakim). A$ap has been homeless, sold drugs, his brother died, etc. He has lived the life.

He's released 2 albums thus far. The first was a mixtape called Live. Love. A$ap back in 2011. It's awesome and you should listen to the whole thing. The second was his first mainstream album called Long. Live. A$ap released in January 2013. It's also awesome and you should listen to the whole thing.

You ever hear a song that is SOOOOOOO FREAKING AMAZINGLY GOOD it makes you want to like pull your hair and mush your face and go "OH. MY. GOD. This song is SICK!"? That is how pretty much everything this dude has put out makes me feel. But this song in particular is disgustingly sick. It's called Bass and it is #3 off the mixtape Live. Love. A$ap...

This one is also good. It's #2 off the mixtape...

Another good one.. #10 off the mixtape...

Now let's get into some new stuff off Long. Live. A$ap...

Of course you know this song with Skrillex. If you don't see Happy Monday! Theme Songs to Kick Off Yet Another Week...

Then of course there is this one with 2 CHAINZ, Drake, and Kendrick Lamar (who is also crazy awesome)...

But I'm sure you haven't heard this one yet... It's so dark and weird and obscure that I just don't know if people are quite ready. This is the title track off the album..

Also this one is crucial...

This last one is not on the mixtape or the album but I'm feelin it.. It's called Shabba and it's by another member of the A$ap Mob crew, A$ap Ferg. It features A$ap Rocky and the video has a special cameo made in it by none other than the legendary dancehall artist Shabba Ranks. There is an article on MTV's website that talks about just how rare this is called A$AP Ferg Explains 'Very Rare' Shabba Ranks Cameo, Frame By Frame...

There are loads more songs by A$ap Rocky that I encourage you to check out so go get your YouTube on like now!